The Burning Within
I lived most of my life with a burning inside of me. A burning that was screaming to be unleashed. I had no idea how. I didn't have a clue as to how to let these billowing flames push it's way out. I deprived them of needed oxygen for a long time and soon that torch became coals, taking a back-burner to my busy life. With a husband and two kids, I gladly set everything aside. There was lots to do. Lots to keep me busy. I know as other moms read this, you know exactly what I am talking about. We are all about the task at hand. What is that burning flame, inside of you? What is that billowing fire inside of you that has been placed on the back-burner?
Though merely coals, something about them still called to me. At night after the kids were tucked in, or even when something needed attention, those coals would wellup my heart. I remember sitting in the grass playing with my daughter, and all the while, those embers lit up my soul. I found myself at the alter a few days later, down on my knees asking God if that burning had anything to do with Him. I was already engaged in a vibrant relationship with Him, so I knew it wasn't rescuing that I burned for. As I prayed, the burning increased tremendously till it became scorching. It had a familiar hold on me and realized that I knew what that burning was. It was a calling on my life.
As I had mentioned in my very first blog (A Year of Firsts), even from childhood, I often had a camera in hand. I didn't realize until I took to prayer, that it was more than just a hobby. It is a part me. A gift that God has given to me. A gift that I am amazed by.
Where Do I Begin?
I have a confession to make (at the risk of sounding less than intelligent): Growing up I always thought that my mom was saying " wherever there is a WHEEL there is a way". Nope! (but at the time it made total sense. I thought well, if I am ever stuck and there are wheels around me I can make a way.. I can build something to get me somewhere)...Nope! It wasn't until my early 20's that I realized what she was actually saying. And the meaning was never more real to me than after I had chunked all my concerns of fear, doubt, "but how's", and right out excuses toward God. He is so patient, isn't He? In my heart, I couldn't stop hearing the firm but soft "If you just be Willing child"! Right there I decided that although I didn't know how, I would surly let those flames out and I would do it for Him and led by Him. How could I not? What a gracious gift. Only with Him would this flame stay lit. The one who gave it to me. I would use it to serve and worship God.
1 Peter 4:10
As each has received a gift, use it to serve one another, as good stewards of God's varied grace:
When All You Have Is A Little Faith, It Is More Than Enough
I had no idea how God was going to provide. I did know from past experience with God, that if He places something so strongly in your heart, He will surely give you everything you need to do whatever He asks. I started out taking photos with my phone. Shortly people started asking me to do family photos. Then a friend gave me a great but far from professional Olympus point and shoot pocket camera. I found that as long as I was willing, even though I didn't have any knowlege and very little to work with, God would make a way. He wasn't only providing practice and opportunity, but He was providing me other means in which to grow. Every time I got asked to do something bigger, He provided better equipment and ways for me to learn to be able to do what was asked of me. Now I have a pro camera and great equipment in less than 3 years. I have shot two weddings and multiple other opportunities that I am just wowed by!
1 Corinthians 12:4-6
Now there are varieties of gifts, but the same Spirit; and there are varieties of service, but the same Lord; and there are varieties of activities, but it is the same God who empowers them all in everyone.
Playing tHE Background Is Ok With Me
I never want to do this aside from God. There is a song I love by an artist named Lecrae, called "Background". What truth is in those lyrics!
My God has put within me a passion. If I let Him take the spotlight, He can do amazing things. I just need to be willing! Nothing I have done has really done anything for my business. From every opportunity to every client, He has blessed me greatly. My gratefulness is overflowing! Those talents and gifts...that flame inside you was placed there by God and when you Let Him lead you, it will begin to flow out of you in a way that you see miracles and that flame will become a wildfire!
May you seek out God and your purpose in Him!
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